Project 365 officially starts today. I currently can’t get internet service at work but I shall blog anyway and post later. I had a quiet New Years Eve. I was in bed by 9:30pm. Apparently, there were fireworks going off that my client heard. I thought it was a dream. I guess it was real?! I was tired. I never sleep well the night before I have to work. I get so anxious that I am going to oversleep that I can’t sleep at all.
Moving on...my client is driving me crazy today. And I took my meds so i can't blame my irritability on my Bipolar. he has peed every 15 minutes and peed his pants 3 times today. Not to mention, he wants to pull my arm out its socket because he doesnt want to do the work to stand up. I have completely been lifting his big ass up out his chair. Well I can't do it anymore and I told him he is hurting my back and I have 2 more days here. There is no reason for me to be going home sore. he can do it. He is just lazy!We did physical therapy yesterday and I think I did more work than he did. Its ot my job to move him around. That is the point of physical therapy to increase his range of motion so he can get around better. Maybe I am just irritable after having so many days off. I dont know. All I know is I guess he is gonna be peeing his pants alot more if he cant get his ass out of his chair! I can't be lifting him. He is bigger, taller and heavier! I have had other clients that were skinny and very light in those cases yes I can lift them but he is too big. Ok enough about that...God give me patience...
On a lighter note...there is John. I am really looking forward to meeting him on Monday. it is truly a blind date and I hope he is cute. Just a full rack of teeth would be great. I'm really not that superficial but I think anyone would agree that there has to be some sort of physical attraction. I wish he would send a picture so I kinda know what to expect. Could always be like Lisa Kudrow in PS I love you and get the kiss out of the way. The first 3 criteria have been met. Single? Yes Employed? Yes Gay? No so now the next step is the kiss. It will be a bold gesture, I know. But everything else hasn't helped or forged forward so why not take a chance? He texted me yesterday before going to his friend's house that lives in the sticks and he knew he would not have any service. I thought that was nice that he actually pulled over to text me. He stayed over at his friends' house and today went out for munchies in between the Penn State game and the Ohio State football game. Again, I thought it was nice for him to text me when he had service. It's the little things that make me happy. I am secure enough in myself for boys' nights. I think boys' and girls' nights out are healthy. His, Hers, and our time. I let him off the hook and told him I didnt want to keep him and I didn't.Let's see if he texts me when he gets home after the game. I think I might email him directions on sending a pic via his iPhone. May be I just should leave it alone. I went this far blindly and another couple days won't hurt.
Let's see what are my New Year's resolutions? First, I have my project 365, my personal therapy. It's linked to my twitter page so maybe people will follow me?
Speaking of following me just to digress for a moment. I haven't heard from Todd since he asked me for money to pay his cell phone bill. I don't understand? He seeks me out over a period of 5 years and says all these things and then falls of the face of the earth again. I am sooo glad I didn't go to AZ for Christmas because Lord knows I might have been ass out at the airport and be on my own for 6-10 days. I hope everything is okay in AZ will Todd and he is doing well. I hope he will move past his ego since I know it had to difficult to ask for monetary help, and calls me or emails me. I care about him dearly but i cannot support him financially. If I gave him money, if I had it, what does that do for me? I know that might sound selfish but seriously? We are 2700 miles away from each other and I just don't think that much of a gap is easy to overcome. I have let me go.
Resolution #2...stick to my diet! I have lost 20 pounds so far and I wanna melt the fat. I don't care about the weight number, per say, but i want to lose my way into a smaller wardrobe. I took a week off and i think being back at work is really helping me get back on track. At home, its so easy to fall back into the "easy" bad habits. That's what it boils down to! Convienence and fat run hand in hand. I am motivated and as the new year begins it is easy to eat at work because that's all the food there is. I don't normally eat whatever he eats anyway so it's easy to stick to my diet. On average after the weekend when i go home and weigh my self there is a 1-2 pound difference! So let's see how much more weight I can lose in the new year. Let's see if I can put on a nice bathing suit in the summer. That would be really nice to not feel so self conscious near water. We will see...
Resolution #3...actually use my treadmill. It has sat in my house for four years and I have barely touched it. Well now there is no excuse! It is in my room, I took it downstairs and it shouldnt be my clothes hanger! Next I have to bring down my filing cabinet and sewing table and finally bring Ariel's bunk bed upstairs. I want to make my office but I don't know how that is going to work with the modem? I will need to find out about that. Also I need to hook up the cable upstairs in the playroom since that's where Ariel will be watching TV. I probably won't even do it only because i cant get her dresser upstairs! I would need to buy her new dressers to put her clothes in if she totally moves upstairs. It's an option! But I don't see my office happening anytime soon but I'm running outta room in my bedroom for anything with my king size bed in there. There are some technical issues that need to be sorted out before the room changing begins. But that doesnt take away from the fact that I need to use my treadmill. See how that came full circle. Eventually anyway.
Well, it's 7:18pm which means that my client should be going to bed in the next hour to hour and a half. that means I can take my grumpy ass to bed and start fresh tomorrow. I need to go see Linda and tell her about my off sleeping patterns. Its a constant struggle, me and sleep. And! I need to get to the GYN and get my Depo shot. I know Depo is weight bearing but with my diet going on it's worth the piece of mind. I would eventually like to be in a monogamous relationship and maybe even consider having another child but that is a looooong way off. So, for now, hello Depo. Maybe I should call tomorrow? I don't know if they would be open but if anything I will call on Monday for a Tuesday appointment.
Good night all! I hope everyone has a great New Year and stick to your guns as I will be...I can be your cheerleader!
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